The rundown: Ten popular drugs in ten awe-inspiring sentences

Okay, look. I usually try to post about fairy obscure compounds, since the internet is teeming with about a zillion drug/medicine sites (not to mention the dreaded Wikipedia) that will give you a much more comprehensive rundown on any popular drug out there than I can even begin to hope to accomplish. Sure, it won't be nearly as snarky or silly as it would be here, but it essentially renders me obsolete. Boo.

That said, it's awfully tempting to post about popular drugs, since that means more Google searches coming my way. I'm all about having a hip blog on the Internet, folks. So I've given in. I surfed on over to Forbes.com for 'The World's Ten Best-Selling Drugs (of 2006)' and wrote this post.

Ten drugs, ten sentences. Pure D & P styling.

1. Lipitor (atorvastatin) is given to older people to slow the inevitable progression of cardiovascular disease (aka the death march) by lowering their cholesterol levels.
2. Plavix (clopidogrel) inhibits platelet aggregation, thus making it less likely that blood clots will bung up your arteries and kill you if you have some sort of vascular disease.
3. Nexium (esomeprazole) deals with heartburn, peptic ulcers, and other stomach ailments by knocking stomach acid production out of commission.
4. Seretide/Advair is a two-drug formulation of fluticasone (makes things less inflamed) and salmeterol (opens up the airways) used to deal with asthma and COPD.
5. Zocor (simvastatin) is essentially a less popular and yet equally exciting version of atorvastatin.
6. Norvasc (amlodipine) is but one of the oodles of drugs that relieve angina and lower blood pressure by opening up arteries.
7. Zyprexa (olanzapine) makes crazy people not be crazy by stimulating or blocking an array of different receptors in the brain including those for dopamine and serotonin.
8. Risperdal (risperidone) is basically just like olanzapine, only with a lousier name.
   
9. Prevacid (lansoprazole) is akin in chemical structure and action to esomeprazole.
10. Effexor (venlafaxine) helps depressed and anxious people to brighten up and chill the heck out.